Question

read this body paragraph from a research - based essay.
just as most high school students have a choice in what interests to pursue, their parents also have a choice. they must decide what role to play in nurturing their teens interests. according to research, a parents behavior toward a child engaged in an extracurricular activity directly affects the childs behavior. dr. yuma blankenship states that a parents behavior, such as emotional support and modeling, can influence a childs beliefs and value system both in and out of the activity that the child is participating in (knight 7).
which statement is the best evaluation of this paragraph?
the paragraph does not have a topic sentence, so it is only partially complete.
the paragraph is sound but needs more supporting evidence to be complete.
the paragraph is less effective after the first sentence because of its disconnected ideas.
the paragraph needs to be completely revised, since it lacks focus and clarity.

Explanation:

The paragraph starts with a general statement about high - school students having a choice in interests. Then it talks about parents' role in nurturing teens' interests. But it suddenly jumps to a parent's behavior in an extracurricular activity (with a citation). The connection between the general idea of students' choice and the specific example of parents' behavior in extracurriculars is not clear. There is a lack of a smooth transition or a clear focus on a single main idea that ties all the elements together.

Answer:

The paragraph needs to be completely revised, since it lacks focus and clarity.